Recent Birthday Parties, Holidays, Events, Etc
Have Me Puzzled:
What is an Appropriate Gift When You Are a Bargainista Extroadinaire?
This is more of an open question without a multiple choice or clear cut answer. All these holidays and birthdays have me pondering: What is an appropriate gift to present to someone when you are a bargainista extroadinaire and snag very valuable gifts on the cheap?
One example scenario is this:
Over the holidays, we had a Dirty Santa gift exchange at our Bunco group. The idea was to spend about $10 tops to get a (nice, not crummy) gift for the exchange. I did bargain hunt and take a gift that I "cheated" on.. It was about a $15 gift I spent $10 on. However, one lady at the exchange, the one that sent me on my couponing path to begin with, really cheated. She is the KNOWN COUPONER of the group. She brought a gift basket FULL of awesome "drugstore" products.. Lady Schick Razors, refills, Olay stuff, etc etc etc. This was like a $60 basket she paid less than $10 for by working her coupon deals, etc.
That is an interesting and funny example. We got a kick out of that gift. It was stolen the max number of times, even.
But still. Here's the dilemma: You are known to be a couponer. You can get $55 Disney Princess costumes for $12 at the outlet. $35 OshKosh Sandals for $1.35. So... your child gets invited to a birthday party.. what do you bring? Do you pay $15 (more than what you spend on a fancy Disney costume dress) for a gift that looks more in line with what the host might expect? Or do you coupon, save money, and give a nicer gift? Ok, friends and such don't care about the gift. That isn't what it is about. I get that. But, if my child walks in with a gift I can afford that has been stashed in my gift closet for 6 months, but looks really nice, that's bad, right? What is a couponer to do?? Don't say gift card. That hurts the heart. LOL! (Although, couponers LOVE to get a modest gift card.. we can stretch those bad boys out!)
OR, what about the flip side? Your in- laws know the deals you get. SO, when you present them with something nice, they are going to know you got it on the cheap. Do you gift them with more to compensate for what you really would have spent on that item??
It really boggles the mind. I recently put together a gift for a 4 yr old. It was a nice gift. Original value of all the items was more than $30. I spent $8 on all of it, total. I was like this is a rockin gift. Then, I added up the out of pocket expense. I was like whoa. I only spent $8 on all this? That's great.. but... the friendship there deserved nicer than an $8 gift. My husband walks in and is like WOW, NICE GIFT! He didn't know the out of pocket meagerness. So, I resolved to call that gift "done and good". And it was.
SO, how do you balance your deals with the feeling that you are being too cheap.. Or worse, that your deal saving makes you give gifts that are too nice sometimes.. oops. It is a fine line I walk.
And I wonder, do I walk that line alone? Are others as gift conscious? When you get a gift from me, untold amount of thought goes into it. Am I alone in that? Do you wonder about your gifts from your Deal Steals Gift Closet? LOL.
My mother loves Pantene Products. I get these free from time to time and gift her with my overstock.. Just thinking of her... and she loves that. But she also knows I am being cheap with those types of gifts! Catch 22!
So, how do you all handle these situations?
*On the other hand, my neighbor LOVES the freebies gift bags I put together for her every month! She just totally chuckles when I bring her dish soap, paper towels, and toothpaste!
I think people should appreciate the thought without consideration for how much a gift cost or is worth. So I give what I think people might like. I don't put price tags or spending requirements on what I give people. If they love me, they'll appreciate the thoughtfulness, and be glad for me that I saved money at the same time. Otherwise, I don't trouble myself to worry what they think. Also, as far as things like the Dirty Santa w a set amount to spend, I get something that's worth the amount, and if I saved money, that's my little secret. It's no one's business how much I actually spent. ;)
ReplyDeleteI totally agree. I think part of my problem/ dilemma is that, in my deal hunting, coupon using case, I can afford to give "nicer" more like "$50" presents more than I can afford a toy off the shelf, etc. And sometimes, it would be tacky to show up with what looks like a $50 present, even if you spent $12 on it. Do you all ever experience any issues like that?
ReplyDeleteIt gets tricky when you coupon and rebate and end up getting paid to own the latest Disney Dvd, or you find $30 toys for $3...
The big issue I face with my deal hunting is figuring out how to gift appropriately. On the other hand, Christmas and "Santa" time is a cinch for my kids..
for what my opinion is worth, Lahni, i have given $1 water squirt guns or $1 coloring books with a cheap box of crayons before for a gift, b/c thats all i could afford--really. i am sure that some snooty etiquette authority somewhere is looking down their nose at us, but honestly, i dont care. there are much richer things in life to worry about, like how can we find a moment to take the kids outside and play or be able to let the day's responsibilities go long enough to crawl into bed and read a book up under the covers by flashlight. i think that life is just a vapor and too short to fill it with worry. a gift is a symbol of your thoughtfulness and love toward someone; if they dont appreciate it, then that is their issue. more specifically, if i were you, and i brought a $50 item that i spent $12 on, i would just say, "your kid is lucky, b/c i was bargain hunting this week, and found this for next to nothing! i couldnt believe my luck! i sure hope he likes it!" how could the parent be anything but ecstatic? i should think that if they were judgemental and snobbish about it, you shouldnt be at their party anyway. do what i did--relieve yourself of the duty of attending birthday parties--haha! --one less thing to worry about in life, and more time to invest in those little guys!:D you are a VERY thoughtful, loving person from reading about you in your blog, and how you help your readers, and you should give yourself a little more credit!
ReplyDeleteThat's really sweet! You guys are right. Go to the parties of folks you love. Then, you don't have to worry about it. I just don't want to commit any faux pas bc of the deal/couponing thing and wondered if anyone else had that same issue. :)
ReplyDeleteAnd, I don't even care if folks show up without a present.. I encourage it even.. my kids just love to play with friends!
Good food for thought, all! Thanks!